What is Self-Care and why do I need it?

Why does anyone need self-care? Well, guess what. It is the most understated and least valued health treatment that exists. Much like many illnesses can go undiagnosed, research will point you in the right direction eventually. And when you find a cure or solution to your ailment that actually also* treats various other challenges in your body presently, whereas other medicines only take care of one or two issues, wouldn’t you choose the one that hits more targets? Most of us would. I mean, why not? Unless we question the validity or the potency, we turn to something that sounds more direct, concentrated, focused, intentional… Well, self-care does both, does it all, and is proven to beat out many so-called “medicines” and even prevents and manages ailments. Many articles include research of all kinds, but I’ll include only some here.

Self-care treats, prevents and manages everything from mental ailments such as stress and anxiety to physical sicknesses such as tension, fatigue, aches, and pains. It makes big impacts such as putting life into perspective –or better yet, clarifies the many valuable aspects of life. It can very well save a life. (link my blog here: How Self-care saved my life). Self-care plays a big part in successfully juggling busy multi-layered calendars, the how-to’s of eating healthier, and the identity-robbing factors of life! Self-care helps to create an atmosphere at home (or work) that you can look forward to. It makes the feeling of wanting to escape feel less intense and full of suffering. The need for a vacation isn’t greater than the enjoyment of day-to-day when you are doing self-care right. Travel can still be exciting and not be a relief to your everyday life. Self-care cultivates happiness, joy, and harmony in everything you do.

Now, what about how-to… It’s easier to say what self-care is not. It is not a date with a friend, a call to a trusted family member, or a soak in a bathtub. Self-care is not a salon appointment or attending an event. The friend that qualifies for a self-care date is yourself. A family member that should be trusted most is yourself. If not in a consistent practice or included in daily rituals, the occasional bathtub soak can change up weekly, monthly, or so can only loosely be considered self-care. A salon appointment is like doing hygiene extra credit and does not improve your life. It improves your outer appearance, presentation, and image. It is not enough to take a break. It is how you take a break. For example, at work, if your schedule permits for you to take a legal break, government law doesn’t care how you spend that time as long as you spend it away from your immediate workspace or at least stop working for the time allotted. In that case, you can join others in a breakroom, walk-in pairs around the company building, or have a cigarette break in the designated area in which it very possible you’ll not find yourself alone. You don’t always have to be alone to do valid self-care, but you do need to have practice being successful at doing it even with distractions surrounding you, much like meditation or simply studying at a park vs. a quiet room. It takes concentration, and concentration takes focus, and focus takes practice. Self-care, however, can be simple, and in fact, the more simple, the more effective it can be. If what is considered self-care isn’t restorative, healing, and relieving, then it isn’t enough to be deemed true and legitimate self-care. If a break isn’t giving you enough rest and a bath isn’t removing your stress then there is much to say about learning what self-care can really do at a deeper level. For the mind, self-care goes into the psychology of your being, existence, and beliefs. Find resources to tackle that, such as hiring a qualified therapist, counselor, or life coach. Self-care for the spirit can be found in meditation practices (there are various), for some, it comes in the form of yoga or reiki, and for others, it is research and spiritual studies while also applying practice. There’s also emotional self-care, physical, even financial. But the self-care area that is my favorite and I love most of all is the self-care one can create in our personal surroundings. 

The environment that we make, manage and/or allow has a lot to do with our self-worth, caring compassion for one-self, and most of all, self-love. Without these areas of core values and principles in high priority, how else can we expect to succeed in anything we do on a day-to-day basis? Without fueling and tuning up our car, we cannot expect it to move and perform as it should. The same goes for our body and entire being so that we can be there for ourselves, our loved ones, and our jobs. Setting boundaries is never a selfish act, and taking time to take care of Yourself is not something to feel guilty about. Once you understand how your internal (or outwardly expressed) complaining can be positively diminished and your time is fairly distributed as needed, never leaving yourself out in the planning of it all (by the way, later it will just flow, and you won’t be searching for or running out of “me-time”) you’ll start to eliminate resentment and guilt. Learning about true self-care, diving deeper into not just the knowledge but the wisdom of its true meaning and devotion, you’ll recognize that self-care is not just earned as a reward but that it is the best gift you can ever give yourself in this lifetime, that you deserve it and that it is vital to achieving the best life you could live.