Releasing the selfish guilt vs. healthy restorative effort

It is common to hear that women feel guilty if they do something for themselves before doing things for others. Or that “Me Time” should be considered a reward for hard work. Let me tell ya something. It is not selfish to take care of yourself; essentially that is what you are doing by taking time to enjoy your self-care daily. Yes, it is possible to do it daily. If you would like more guidance on this please feel free to schedule a no-obligation consultation with me.

In a previous blog, I briefly mentioned the notion of recharging in order to have the energy you need to do all the things that you are expected to at work and all of the ways you participate at home taking care of family. Not filling up your gas tank in a car would be silly to expect to keep going without running out of speed and eventually shutting down. And just like automobiles have warning lights and check engine warnings, our bodies do too. Each of us with our own unique system will be notified by our body in different ways that at times vary from one person to another even if the diagnosis is the same in result. The point is you must learn to read your own signals. We all calibrate differently at various levels of tolerance that only we could feel and understand. This unique form of reading one’s own body should indicate just how sacred it is to take care of our own. It is absolutely good to see doctors, therapists, and specialists, though in the end you always know yourself best when it comes to caring that you require. Self-care is preventative as well as an assist in managing good health and energy.

The difference between “Me Time” and “Self-Care” is that “me” time can very easily fall into the category of believing you are selfish. It is a form of separation from others; therefore, it can make you feel like you are abandoning ship. The word “me” sounds selfish to some. And, sure, it can be. What is important is how to convert the typical “Me Time” that is only taken randomly, taken when you feel frustrated, fed-up or that you’ve “had enough” into a positive time, healthy activity, and consistent restorative practice. Charge to your battery is “Me Time,” if that. Charging and replacing your battery on scheduled due time is self-care. Gassing-up your engine is “Me Time.” Gassing up and getting proper oil changes and tune-ups would be self-care. So the next time you think it’s best to go without self-care, think how you’d be to not gas-up your car for a road trip. And if you really want to keep up your self-care and not just steal some “me time” but really hone in on the importance and need for consistency, think how much better and less stressful your road trip would be if you also checked your tires, oil, and tune-up schedule on time with time. It takes planning to do proper maintenance of anything. You deserve it too.